My summer has largely consisted of refreshing my LinkedIn feed, polishing up my resume, and applying to jobs. Besides looking for a “big girl job,” this summer has also brought about change to my hearing health as well.
A couple months ago, I was editing an article for the Association of Late Deafened Adults (ALDA), where I am the editor for the newsletter. The article was about the Oticon More hearing aid. After doing a quick Google search about this hearing aid, the part that stood out to me was that this particular hearing aid could increase speech understanding by 15%. Intrigued by this finding, in June I asked my audiologist about purchasing an Oticon More for my next hearing aid. I had the same hearing aid since freshman year of high school, and let’s face it -- getting a new one was probably way overdue. My audiologist agreed that it was probably time to get a new hearing aid, and soon I had an appointment set up to get a new hearing aid! I hadn’t realized that hearing technology had been advancing so much in the time that I had my old hearing aid. When I got my new hearing aid, I swapped out my dome for an ear mold and traded voices and sounds that I could not understand for voice clarity and understanding. In fact, when I found out that my new hearing aid could connect to my phone via bluetooth, I was ecstatic. I could enjoy music again for the first time in four years. I remember excitedly calling my closest friends on my cell phone right when I got home and hearing them tentatively pick up. Up until that point, I only called if it was an emergency or by accident. After I called my friends, I called my grandma, who I call Granny, and she sounded so excited for me. I hadn’t realized how much I missed hearing the sound of her voice until I was talking to her over the phone. After we hung up, I cried on my bedroom floor. My new hearing aid has given me the opportunity to experience and enjoy sound again. I’ve been able to hear sounds that I’ve almost forgotten existed: the hum of the AC, my dogs’ paws tapping the floor, pages turning. I’m even grateful for the more annoying sounds too, like the sound of people chewing food. After I had the chance to re-experience sounds, I also had a moment of self-doubt. Now that I could hear better, was I still hard of hearing? I spent the past couple years learning how to accept my disability, but was getting a new hearing aid that gave me a newfound ability to hear mean that I needed to drop my disability identity? I wrestled internally with this thought in my mind for the next week or so. After a heartfelt conversation with my mom, I came to this conclusion: My new hearing aid doesn’t make me less hard of hearing. I thought it did at first, especially because I can hold conversations pretty well now. My new hearing aid helps me hear, but it doesn’t take away my experiences and identity as a hard of hearing person. I know ASL, I love learning more about disability, and I’ve learned how to advocate for myself. In conversations now, I sometimes still have to ask people to repeat themselves (which was a moment of familiarity that brought me comfort). However, I’m also able to participate in group conversations without being too confused, I don’t get listening fatigue as much, and I can even listen to my favorite songs if I pull up the lyric videos too. I can hear tone and catch side comments and can contribute a laugh of my own and mean it. My new hearing aid has reopened a world for me that I thought I would no longer be a part of. I am so grateful to have the chance to experience hearing again. As I continue to take in this change, I will continue to learn more ASL and educate myself about disability. My new hearing aid does not make me less hard of hearing, but I will forever be grateful for the hearing that it has given me every time I put my hearing aid on.
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ABOUT MEGrace Avila is a passionate writer, editor, and boba lover amongst other things. In her free time, she likes to read, write, and hang out with her service dog Charlie! ArchivesCategories |